My Genesis

It's been a very long time since I've written. I know what your all saying, "Why Michaela!? You said you'd never leave us!" I promised this blog wouldn't be an abandoned one, and though I went through a lot of stuff, I'm keeping my promise. So I'm sorry for my long absence. But I'm back.

It feels good writing again...I missed it.

So let's get to business:

While I've been away, I went through a lot. First it was good! Met a boy, fell in love, got engaged...but it wasn't all that it seemed. With lies and deceitfulness, sugar coated with love - it came to a complete halt. We broke up, just about a month ago and I'd be lying if I said it didn't hurt. I cried myself to sleep every night for awhile, but what doesn't kill you makes you stronger - which I'm finding is true.

He took me away from everything that was important to me, I haven't been myself, nor happy for the year we were together. I was extremely discouraged, hate to admit, I still get like that on occasion but I'm healing. It was a weight off my chest to not feel his control, I cried myself with laughter and happiness the first day we broke up, but of course you have the mind vs. heart dilemma - so slowly the sadness crept in.

I'm calling this my genesis because I'm starting all over. I recently deactivated my facebook account (which is a big deal to me!) and going in to a kind of silence, save for my family, my blog, and God. I'm taking this time to humble myself and focus on HaShem. Hopefully get back on my feet and on the right path.

So expect more blog posts and hopefully the old me back.

1 By David: Bless ADONAI, my soul! Everything in me, bless his holy name! 2 Bless ADONAI, my soul, and forget none of his benefits! 3 He forgives all your offenses, he heals all your diseases, 4 he redeems your life from the pit, he surrounds you with grace and compassion, 5 he contents you with good as long as you live, so that your youth is renewed like an eagle's.

Beauty

1 Samuel 16:7

But ADONAI said to Sh'mu'el, "Don't pay attention to how he looks or how tall he is, because I have rejected him. ADONAI doesn't see the way humans see - humans look at the outward appearance, but ADONAI looks at the heart."

I came across this in my InterPersonal Communications class and I know its an issue that everyone deals with in one area or the other so I thought I'd share it.

We were discussing our culture and the image that it gives us at such a young age.

This one is more about race, but nevertheless, the beauty and to what extent people will go to gain an image that they see as "beautiful" based on our society. Towards the end they show how even little kids have been taught the same image, the last girl in the doll test was just so sad :(

http://www.understandingrace.org/lived/video/index.html

Ah, this one makes me laugh. I used to think that it was normal to look like Barbie and that women who didn't were messed up and that men just HAD to look like GI Joe's.

http://www.johnriviello.com/bodyimage/dolls.html

And last but not least, where do these images of beauty come from? Mostly in advertisement. Here's one by dove . . . I used to say "Why don't I look like that?" well, because no one does - not even the model you're looking at.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iYhCn0jf46U

I'm not the type that usually posts stuff like this, but it made me a little sad how our culture is. For so much of my life I went through the I'm-not-pretty stage and was simply never happy with myself. I eventually realized that beauty is shallow and that I had better things to worry about - I stopped wearing makeup completely, stopped curling and straightening my hair and just let it fall into my natural wave. I still continue that for the most part and I'm happy and content knowing that I'm beautiful on the outside (here comes the cheesy part) and because of HaShem - my spirit is beautiful too.

Proverbs 31:30

Charm can lie, beauty can vanish, but a woman who fears ADONAI should be praised.

Salvation

How do we define being "saved"? Is it asking "jesus" into our hearts? Is it by works? Is it a guarantee one-pass ticket to heaven? How do we know who is saved? Or if we're saved, for that matter?!

This used to bother me so much! When I was a little girl I thought that if you were a good person then you would be going to heaven, you were indeed saved. I remember looking at people and saying "They seem really nice, I'm sure they're going to heaven", as cute/funny as that seems it was bad! Not that I knew any better at that age, but I was doing that because I was wondering if I was a good enough person - if I was going to heaven or not. I believed that movie "All Dogs Go to Heaven" for the first few years of my life. "See theres even good dogs, just like they'res good people!" . . . no. Not so much. Obviously I found out that animals dont have souls, it was crushing. Where would my Mr. Barky Buns Schnauzer go after that UPS incident?!

But back to the real issue - salvation. I've heard a lot about how Jews aren't saved if they don't believe in Yeshua. When I hear this, my mind goes mad - how can a Jew not be saved?! It doesn't seem right to me. Jews are so serious about their beliefs, I realize not every Jewish person is religious, but most who are - its awesome what they do! Jews drastically change their lives to live according to Torah. We don't see this drastic change in christianity, well, not very often at least - and when we do, it seems to fade away.

I believe full-heartedly that many Jews are saved! Because what are we saved by? Faith! If we look at a Torah observant Jew - they have so much faith, a lot more than your average John Wayne from Riding With Jesus Cowboy Church! (Yeah, its real.) So by following Torah, something that most christians don't do, I think a Jew can be saved - not because of works, but because they walk in their faith, and also they are following Yeshua if they realize it or not.

I would like to add that only HaShem knows who is saved, because it really is all about the heart of the person.

Romans 3:27-31

27 So what room is left for boasting? None at all! What kind of Torah excludes it? One that has to do with legalistic observance of rules? No, rather, a Torah that has to do with trusting. 28 Therefore, we hold the view that a person comes to be considered righteous by God on the ground of trusting, which has nothing to do with legalistic observance of Torah commands. 29 Or is God the God of the Jews only? Isn't he also the God of the Gentiles? Yes, he is indeed the God of the Gentiles; 30because, as you will admit, God is one. Therefore, he will consider righteous the circumcised on the ground of trusting and the uncircumcised through that same trusting. 31 Does it follow that we abolish Torah by this trusting? Heaven forbid! On the contrary, we confirm Torah.

Guide to Shalom

I stumbled over a page in my Philosophy notebook that read "Guide to Shalom". I knew it couldn't be notes from that class - no way! Looking closer I realized it was something I had jotted down for myself. I hardly remember writing this . . . it was quite a long time ago, but I remembered why I wrote it - the fear of losing myself and losing sight of God while getting caught up in the meaningless stress of life.

Just reading it gave me shalom - now I want to frame and hang it up so I'll always see it! Anyway, I won't share all of it, but I will share most to you guys, hope it brings you some peace and reality of what really matters.

Guide to Shalom

Breathe - at least once a day. Be in awe of life and thank Him for it all, worship, pray, meditate on Him - He is the bringer of shalom!

Let go - completely of the world. In the end, it means nothing.

Get back - who are YOU and what do YOU want to do - what makes YOU happy?

Happiness - go out and get it! No matter what it is.

Strength - call on Him, always.

Ask - and you will receive.

Live - like you're dying. Don't waste away the days given to you.

Hope - don't you ever give up

Psalm 16:7-11

7 I bless ADONAI, my counselor; at night my inmost being instructs me. 8 I always set ADONAI before me; with him at my right hand, I can never be moved; 9 so my heart is glad, my glory rejoices, and my body too rests in safety; 10 for you will not abandon me to Sh'ol, you will not let your faithful one see the Abyss. 11 You make me know the path of life; in your presence is unbounded joy, in your right hand eternal delight.

Religion

Where do I begin? I honestly am at a loss for words with this subject. Why? Because this is something that tares me apart. It tares my heart in half, it tares my spirit from my body, it tares families, friends and relationships into tiny little pieces.

I feel as though I'm in this calm, simple world while everyone else is in their own complex universe, that when they collide it's a huge earth quake. I'm just sitting here, listening to so-and-so tell me why what they believe is right, then so-and-so's best friend over hears us and steps in with his opinion. Pretty soon it's just a big complex argument that I honestly am in awe of. I'm in awe that a human can take something so simple and turn it into something so complex. I'm in awe that we're even arguing about this.

There are so many different views from every single religion out there. All the different sects of each branch, each belief, each reason for this and that. It's complex . . . why can't our belief be simple? That question kills me every time I ask myself that. I ask my neighbor that question and they give me a complex answer. I ask my friend that question and they give me a complex answer. I ask my family that question and they give me a complex answer. I ask my mind that and it gives me a complex answer. I ask my heart that and it sinks in the sea of complexity. I ask God this and His answer is simple. His answer is always simple, I don't think He meant it to be hard for us to understand. We rely too much on what man says. Man makes things complex and that bothers the heck out of me! I can't stand it. I'm sure some of you are thinking, "So, Michaela, what makes you so different?" I previously wrote about trust. Go back to that post and you will find your answer. I don't trust anyone. I trust only in HaShem and I don't follow man - I follow Yeshua Hamashiach. How simple is that?

There is no man on this earth who can separate me from Yeshua - my salvation. There is no man on this earth who can separate me from HaShem - my creator, my God. Not even death can separate us. It's like a marriage, you love God so you WANT to follow His Torah which is like wedding vows! Its beautiful! These two are the only I will fully trust and follow. I cannot even trust myself with myself! I know I can trust the one who made me, with me. I know I can trust the one who died so I could live, with me. Anyone else? No. Absolutely not. Now some will call me a Jew - I follow Torah, oh no! Some will call me a christian - I'm one of those "jesus" people. Some will call me a Messianic - I'm in the middle.

I'm a Hebrew, an Israelite. I'm a follower of Yeshua and I don't know how to make that anymore clear. Any more simple.

I hope everyone who reads this sees the simplicity of God's love. That's what I see. I see that God loves me, so He gave me His Torah so that I might live a justly life knowing right and wrong. And by blessing me as I follow in His ways. I see that Yeshua died for my sins (Torahlessness) because we all screw up. No one can follow Torah to a T all the time. One is incomplete without the other.

Here's what I want anyone reading this to get out of my post:

religion is

1) complex

2) dead

3) man made - man trusting

faith & love is

1) simple

2) ALIVE!

3) trusting in God alone

Ephesians 3:16 - 19

I pray that from the treasures of his glory he will empower you with inner strength by his Spirit, so that the Messiah may live in your hearts through your trusting. Also I pray that you will be rooted and founded in love, so that you, with all God's people, will be given strength to grasp the breadth, length, height and depth of the Messiah's love,yes, to know it, even though it is beyond all knowing, so that you will be filled with all the fullness of God.

Spring Break

Spring break, a time for crazy college kids to go off and get into all kinds of ruckus, trouble and rigamarole. So as a crazy college student, because I'm not like most [; I went up north with my best friend to take photos of Duluth. Now if you've never been to Duluth MN, it is gorgeous and you should go! There are not words to explain its beauty. It's like nothing you've ever seen before. Lake Superior is like an ocean - as far as the eye can see and when I'm there I feel so amazing.

So back to the photos. I wanted to share some with you guys! I took some of the city and a lot of the lake - there is one in particular that really caught the emotions I was looking for and after, in the hotel when I'm looking over them, it hit me! It reminds me of this one picture we used to have in out house when I was very young. I think it was supposed to be a painting of heaven, and it had a table set up, but the table never ended it went down the picture until you couldn't see anything - and this is what I was trying to capture! When I was little that painting blew my mind, seriously I couldn't take it all in, it was so cool. Endlessness, peacefulness, heavenly.

I'm rambling. Hope you guys enjoy the photos!

Reminds me of this crazy picture: http://oneyearbibleimages.com/invitation.jpg

Nehemiah 9:6

6 You alone are the Lord. You made the heavens, even the highest heavens, and all their starry host, the earth and all that is on it, the seas and all that is in them. You give life to everything, and the multitudes of heaven worship you.

Trust

Trust. That word is something I need to do a lot more of. When I say that, I don't mean trusting in people. Who we put our trust in is who we decide to trust with our lives. Can we trust any person with our lives? I see so many of us (maybe its just teenage drama) trust our everything with our "best friend" and what happens the very next day? So-and-so told what's-his-face that he said, she said, gossip. Leading us into a lot of pain and confusion. I never really understood why people put their trust in other people, which is just going to end up a mess. It's like giving away pieces of you and what happens when it goes to the wrong hands? I think it leads a lot of us away from trust all together, thinking that there is no such thing as trust.

I find it very difficult to trust anyone, maybe it's a good thing, maybe it's a bad thing. All I see is we're all people, we mess up, we get hurt - but it's comforting knowing that there is one who will never make you regret your trust in Him. That's the only one I trust. That's the only one who knows the real me, there are no secrets there. I can completely trust in God, I know that anything He tells me is truth, that anything He shows me is real. I can believe anything that comes from Him. Where with people we are constantly on guard. We, I don't want to speak for anyone . . . so this goes for me anyway, are always questioning what people are telling us. Is it true? Is it right or wrong? Should I believe it? Should I trust this person? It's a very hard thing to do and it's something that is always on us even if we do not realize it. But that pressures off if we trust in HaShem!

When I say I don't trust people, I know for everyone of us, including me, that there are people we trust a lot: friends and family, and how can we not! They are around us all the time, some we have grown up with. I trust my family. I trust some of my close friends. But never will I trust anyone of them completely. Thats only for God. Bringing us back to Adam and Chava - who do we trust when there are little lies hidden in the truth, how can we see that? I gave all my trust to God - my whole life, my whole heart, my whole spirit, my whole soul, my whole mind and my whole body. In troubled times it's hard to remember that. We worry about something, over think it when really all we have to do is lay it down before HaShem and TRUST that He will take care of you. It doesn't mean saying "Alright God, I'm not gonna worry about winning the lottery - you'll take care of me! I'll win it!" Well, I'm not complaining if that happened - but no. It means that trusting in Him will give you something else, something more. Relying on our God is giving us knowledge and wisdom not to trust in our selves. When we trust in ourselves or someone else - what is that based on? Nothingness! Just pure emptiness.

Let's remember to trust in God in all things, little or big problems. Whatever it is, just give it to Him, He is in complete control and we can trust Him with everything in our lives. That is indescribable love right there.

Psalm 9:9-10

ADONAI is a stronghold for the oppressed, a tower of strength in times of trouble. Those who know your name put their trust in you, for you have not abandoned those who seek you, ADONAI.

Prayer

I've never stopped to think about prayer. What is it? A little thing you say when you don't know where to turn? Something that is required of our faith? I think its so much more than that, prayer is your heart pouring out, your spirit talking to The Most High. How cool is that? Prayer is endless, it had no rules. It is freedom from our flesh. Just you and God talking. Dang, thats amazing stuff.

The beauty of prayer has no limits - its as easy as singing a song from your heart. Worshiping God, giving Him thanks for keeping His promise to us. We can ask Him of anything and know that He can do anything. Of course, that doesn't mean He will, He will do His will, always. But the comfort of knowing He is there and He is listening to us. Let me say that again . . . He is listening to us, us who are nothing compared to Him. He is so incredible!

Prayer really pulls us closer to God - it tunes us into the spirit and that is when I think we listen to God. A lot of the time when we say God isn't speaking to us, I think, I could be wrong, but I think that He is and that we just don't hear Him. Some Jews like going through their prayers from a siddur. I have one, and I think its helpful because sometimes we want to say things that we aren't sure how to say. If you look at a siddur, it's a big book! Its amazing going through it and seeing all the prayers for everything. Morning prayers to evening prayers - its amazing. Its beautiful! "I gratefully thank You, O living and eternal King, for You have returned my soul within me with compassion - abundant is Your faithfulness!" This is a simple prayer upon arising. Before I read this I never thought about thanking God for returning my soul within my body in the morning. I just wake up and usually complain about how early it is, or how I hate waking up. When really we should see it as a blessing that we are waking up at all. Though, I don't think we should be emotionlessly reading a prayer, rather read the prayer and see how it moves you into other prayers.

Even if we don't have words to say, Romans 8: 26-27 tells us that the Spirit knows, speaking in tongues is like the perfect prayer, it is too deep for words of our own. I know some people who speak in tongues actually do speak another language and the things they say in that language are amazing - and they have no clue what they're saying. His Spirit is powerful and through prayer we can see that power.

In conclusion - I think prayer is amazing. It nourishes our souls, it revives our spirits. It leads us closer to God and keeps us from tripping up so much. I think it would be cool to pray a few times everyday, even if it's while your at work, school, home; just a silent little prayer its amazing how close it can keep you to God, how focused you are just on Him, which is the most important thing - staying focused on Him. The more I pray throughout the day the more shalom I have. The more connected to God, the more I listen, the more I don't care about the worldly things that we carry - it just all melts away. Hallelujah! He is good.

Philippians 4:6-7

Don't worry about anything; on the contrary, make your requests known to God by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving. Then God's shalom, passing all understanding, will keep your hearts and minds safe in union with the Messiah Yeshua.

Breathe

Full time college student with a part time job. That alone is hard enough for me. I know a lot of people who have way more on their plate than that, and from my life experience, I don't handle stress very well . . . unless a complete emotional break down is a good way of handling stress. A little over a year ago I went through every kind of stress that you can imagine. I was a senior in high school, part time college student, while everything in my life was being changed and/or questioned. I felt like I was losing everything I ever was. I bet you can guess what happened next. Oh yes, an emotional break down.

Long story short - I got some tough love from God, a complete wake up call. Totaled my car, I thought this was going to mean even more stress. Of course it did, bills, no car, injuries, insurance - that was all just grand! But I say I got tough love from God because I felt like He showed me something that day. This sounds cheesy, I'm sure, but I remember opening my eyes and the first thing I saw was the sunset reflecting on the Mississippi River, the fresh snow fall like crystals in the air and for once in a long time, I had shalom. It was beautiful and for that very moment, everything in my life was still. Peaceful. Calm. Since then I daily remind myself to stop and breathe. To take a moment from each day to gaze in awe of His glorious creation.

As humans, we take everything for granted, and when our world is pulled out from under us - we don't know where to turn. Our stressful lives seem to put a haze over the one who holds our lives in His hands. We are so busy with living that we forget why we are living! Why we were created! I encourage everyone to take a few minutes from your busyness to breathe and enjoy what HaShem has done in your life. Praising Him, in the simplest of ways throughout the day makes everything so much better, so much more manageable. Giving us peace of mind remember who is really in control.

Psalm 28:7

ADONAI is my strength and shield; in him my heart trusted, and I have been helped. Therefore my heart is filled with joy, and I will sing praises to him.

Getting Started

First, I would like to thank everyone for visiting my blog! I'm hoping that this blog will be a "Breath Of Life" for my readers. For it to be a little get-away from this crazy world, into some encouragement and any tiny tid-bits of wisdom our awesome God has given me to share with you guys.

My brother, Judah, has a very popular blog. Because you're reading this - I'm guessing you've probably read his. "Keep your blog consistent." is the best advice he could give me while I'm heading on my way, wobbly kneed, into this new scary blogging world. With that said, I'm going to do exactly that! I hope to keep my blog updated every week with something new and snazzy to write.

What am I going to write about? The one who has given me His breath of life and filled that life with unspeakable joy. So that right there can cover endless subjects. I also would love to post my photos and music here to share. If there are any suggestions, feel free. I would love to hear them.

Genesis 2:7

Then ADONAI, God, formed a person from the dust of the ground and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life, so that he became a living being.